Dating Tips & Advice

How To Not Get Caught While Having An Affair: A Comprehensive Guide

Cheating isn’t always as black and white as people seem to make it out to be. There isn’t a sole reason why people choose to be unfaithful in their relationship, so you simply can’t judge a book by its cover. But one thing is obvious, and that is people who are in affairs are usually unhappy with their current relationships.

We would hate to break it to you, but being unhappy within a relationship is perfectly normal. Most couples report that they have at one point thought about affairs, but not many have acted upon this. This number is steadily rising and has been for the past couple of years. Therefore, we’ve decided to give you a comprehensive guide on the matter.

Having an affair might be a fun ordeal, but getting caught while you’re doing it is certainly not fun, not in the slightest. When you’re cheating on someone, you want to be as secretive as possible. Luckily for you, we’ve provided some essential tips and internal know-how if you want to avoid this topic. You can find all of it neatly organized below. 

Keep Your Partner Unaware of the Matter

When you’re looking to cheat on your partner, you need to think the whole thing through. There are ample reasons a person would like to cheat on their partner, ranging anywhere from sexual dissatisfaction to some more pressing matters.

Whatever the occasion may be, you need to determine if an affair is your best bet. There is absolutely no going back once you go down this road. Perhaps you can do the whole thing right, and your partner will never know, but if you continue to live with your partner, the cheating will haunt you.

If you’re dead set on cheating, you need to know how to conduct yourself to minimize the possibility of your relationship on the side being outed. There are a lot of potential negatives that can arise from your affair being outed, such as:

  • Loss of partner
  • Loss of livelihood
  • Broken home
  • Divorce
  • Shame and Guilt
  • Frustration
  • Hurt Feelings

Getting away with cheating and dodging these horrible consequences is as simple as being discreet, silent, and secretive about your actions. There are many giveaways when it comes to affairs, and you need to do your best to avoid them. 

Keeping your secret, well, the secret is as simple as remembering the following tips:

Practise Discretion

When you’re having an affair, you need to be very, very discreet about the whole ordeal. That means that you shouldn’t condemn yourself too much for it. It’s all about the mindset, and if you lose confidence in yourself or you’re within a crisis, you’re risking outing yourself.

Always remain calm, relaxed, and collected when you’re about to go out and cheat on your partner. If the two of you are currently living together, do not dress up, prepare, and then throw out a blatant lie. Lying is good when affairs are concerned, but we’re going to get into them a little bit later.

The last thing you want to be is see-through. Before having a lover of the side, you should set the record straight with yourself. You’re having an affair; you want it to be secret, don’t you? 

Buy More Condoms

Buy More Condoms!

When you’re going out to cheat on your spouse, you do not want to get your mutual contraceptive methods. It stands for pills as well. If your partner notices some of your contraceptive measures are missing, you can be in for a world of guilt.

Always purchase a spare box of condoms, and make sure that you keep it well hidden. Don’t keep it in your purse, your jacket, or your car. Keep it somewhere that your spouse doesn’t ever wander. If you’re a woman, you should keep it hidden away in some kitchen jar – if you’re a man, keep it somewhere in the garage. 

Don’t text, e-mail, or message!

That should be an absolute no brainer when it comes to affair dating. Spouses and partners are notorious for rummaging your phone and other contact methods, especially if they doubt your loyalty. Even the most laid back people will resort to this when they think that they are being cheated on.

If you must communicate through these measures, make sure to delete all your histories. If you have your affairs number in your phone, make sure to mask it under something that your spouse probably won’t be suspicious about. 

Remember to be secretive

You need to be secretive, but you can never be too secretive. Avoid being shifty if the matter is brought up, and the most important thing of all, never panic. Panic is hugely detrimental, and might out you faster than you think. If you are asked about having an affair, and you want to keep it secret, make sure to deny it as much as possible. 

Lying About Your Affair | A Brief Overview

When you’re having an affair, being discreet, secretive, and sensitive about the whole ordeal is essential. When you’re trying to do so, lying is virtually inevitable. But do you know how to lie appropriately to conceal your extramarital relationships?

Lying is never okay. But even if it’s not the most honorable thing to do, it’s still very, very necessary at some point. Now, this is a brief guide on lying, the different forms of lying, and how you can handle different situations. So without further ado, let’s get into it?

That might sound redundant, but lying is far more complicated than you might imagine. Simply not telling the truth is not the only way to lie. If you’re simply spewing out things that aren’t true, you’re likely going to out yourself. It’s why understanding the different forms of lying is essential when you’re looking to conceal the truth of your cheating endeavors. 

What are the different types of lying?

  • An Error. An Error is a lie that is made by mistake. When you’re having an affair, you’re not likely going to use this method of lying. It’s a simple and honest mistake.
  • Omitting the Truth. Now, this is a form of lying that you can get behind when you’re having an affair. It’s telling something that isn’t entirely true but is kind of true. It’s emitting important details when telling a story. For example: 

I and X were out for drinks.

While technically accurate, you’re leaving out that you and your lover had spent a couple of hours before you and X had drinks. This is omission at play, a passive form of deception.

  • Humour Lying. It is telling the truth through a joke and a sarcastic manner. It’s straightforward to lie like this and can be very convincing if you usually use this form of humor.

Sure, I went out with him, right after going on a magic carpet ride.

  • Minimizing and Exaggerating. Minimizing or exaggerating the situation is a great way to convey a point. You weren’t having an affair; you were simply talking to that person. Your spouse is the jealous one. See what we did there?

We weren’t flirting; we were just chatting.

  • Fabricated Truths. Fabricated truths are an utterly made-up story that you’re going to present to your significant other. Be careful, though, as fabrications while the most powerful, isn’t the easiest to pull off. Make sure your story is convincing before you present it.  
a Nosy Spouse

Dealing With a Nosy Spouse

If you’re having an affair, your spouse is no doubt going to get suspicious about your actions. How you deal with this is extremely important, as it can dictate the future of your relationship.

If you’re currently having an affair, you’re not likely wanting to leave your current partner. Whether it’s financial security or you’re just looking for something short term, losing your partner could damage you in more ways than you might imagine. 

It means that any suspicion that they throw your way, you must dodge. But dodging a nosy partner is a hard task in itself. 

What if I’m accused?

If you get accused of having an affair, you need to do your best to deny it. It entails acting as natural as possible and dodging any reasonable suspicion. Deny everything that you can, and say you’re insulted by that thought.

Even if you’re having an affair, you need to distance yourself from it completely. Convince yourself that what you’re doing is perfectly harmless, and you’re going to be able to pull this off like an Oscar-worthy actor. 

Acting while cheating

You need to put your acting game on point when you’re having an affair. Hiding from your spouse is not as easy as taking any discreet or secretive proactive measures; it’s about continually acting.

You need to fill the role of a person that isn’t cheating, and that’s sometimes harder than it sounds. You need to ask yourself how you were when things were beautiful between you and your partner. 

That means completely dodging any shifty behavior, any emotional outbreaks, and sexual experience.

What about sex?

When you’re having an affair, you’re most likely having some sex alongside it. You don’t want to quit having sex with your spouse altogether, especially if the problem you have with them is sexual.

Having sex with someone you’re cheating on is a hard thing to do, trust us. But you have to pull through and do your best to pretend that everything is alright. Conduct yourself as you would if you were not having an affair.

What if I’m found out?

What they don’t know won’t hurt them. But if you’re found out, you need to be careful. It is the breaking point at which most people admit to their Affair, and thus ruin their current relationships. You need to deny any involvement with any possible affair as much as you can.

If you want to end your relationship, this is the perfect time to do so. Ending your relationship now isn’t as easy as admitting to your Affair, as that can cause unnecessary guilt or shame from your spouse. You’re also going to hurt them by quite a lot, which is probably not your purpose.

You should end the relationship on the grounds of suspicion. You just can’t handle someone being suspicious of all of your actions, all of the time. What a great way to end the relationship with minimal hurt feelings, and if all the stars are aligned, you can even be in a new relationship with your lover.

The aftermath

When you end your relationship, you need to conduct yourself in a specific manner if you want to hide from your Affair. You should act like you would if you ended a loving relationship, even if you’re secretly pleased.

If you don’t care anymore, you can flaunt your affair by turning it into a relationship. Now, this is not advised, as people might reprimand you for your affair in the first place. Affairs are always best when kept on the down-low.


If you’ve kept everything on the down-low, and you’re sure that everything is going as planned, you’re the cheating dating champ. We advise you to strictly follow this article if you want to have a successful and secret affair, as these tips are integral to the process.

We salute your bravery and hope that you continue to have an excellent affair dating life. Just remember, what they don’t know won’t hurt them!

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